This past week has been strange. I've been getting off the high of leaving Chicago. It was a wonderful week even though when I returned to work and people asked me what I did, I didn't really have much to say. We just had fun. Oh yes, we went on a double decker bus tour (thanks leeanne_marie), went to the Sears tower, visited Lincoln Park Zoo and other tourist-y things, but mostly we hung out and enjoyed our vacation time. My sister lives in a really fun neighborhood and there are tons of things to see and do -- mostly restaurants and there's a lot of good people watching to do. Between Dave and I we took over 500 photos, so once I get those sorted, I'll share them here.
This week: -homemade chocolate soymilk + banana smoothies -Dave started his new job -saw Prince Caspian (meh!) -eye twitching that started on Monday but seems to have disappeared after my dentist appointment on Friday -Dale and Thomas Country Smokehouse Cheddar popcorn -getting to sleep early...well, earlier -hot & humid weather (blah!) -my new t-shirt from kawaii_not -my new necklace (which i believe is the next to last one on the right) from Crafters for Critters that I wanted to wear everyday this week, but kept forgetting because I still haven't unpacked my luggage -walking around aimlessly together after work everyday
I've been oohing and aahing over some things on the web lately. In fact, when am I not doing that? I found this awesome jewelry maker on Etsy that uses beads to put binary messages in her necklaces. I've also been eyeing something on MyPaperCrane, but I'm not going to say what it is because you'll just go buy it right up because of it's sheer cuteness! And there was this great sale on Threadless and Dave and I each got a shirt. I got him this one and I got myself this one. I'm eyeing these two shirts though -- one & two. I'm wondering if I should have my sister go down to the Threadless store and pick them up for us.
All of those things have been open in tabs on my browser for the last week. I just couldn't bare to part with them. Sometimes I have such guilt about buying things, which is why I couldn't spend $150 on a Blythe. I did treat myself after I lost that doll though. I bought this necklace and this ring. Both things remind me of theexits. It was just a coincidence that I fell for that necklace (justbepatient makes lovely things!) and Jane linked to that etsy shop a few entries ago and I've been eyeing a similar ring that was out of my price range. It's still beautiful though and one day I'll splurge and get one.
Also, do you listen to Pandora Radio? I rediscovered it and my station is oh so amazing and amusing to me. I have weird tastes. I'm still tweaking it though.
I think I'm going to go to this Teach English Overseas seminar on Monday. I'm a little scared to go, but I'm not signing up for anything yet. It's something I've been interested in for a long time, but the idea of being so far away from everyone (not that I wouldn't have relatives if I taught in Japan) makes me nervous. It's probably the reason I've been avoiding getting more information about it. But, I suppose I should worry about those kinds of things after the fact.
I honestly think this may be one of the best things about 2008: The Post-Apocalyptic Workout written by The SlackMistress! She is encouraging reader participation, so hopefully, it will be motivating enough to get me shooting guns and um, taking names of people I can use as human shields!
I like playing this game when I feel stressed out. The song is quite soothing and there's a bunny and the animation is really good and cute. Plus, snow!
& talking about snow, I'm not ready for it. I don't have shoes for it. I barely have shoes. I can't wear converse in the snow on the way to work, I'll be soaked. It's terrible, so many years in New England and I've never owned a pair of boots. I finally bought a real cold weather jacket last year, which was extremely useful while waiting outside for the bus, when it was 14 degrees outside. It should never be that cold. And until you've been in 14 degree weather, you don't realize that 32 degrees and snowing is so very lovely. So lovely, lovely. I always used to think that if it was cold outside and there was no snow, just frostbitten grass, that we were being ripped off. Snow is pretty and everything, but commuting in it is horrible, especially on foot, but out of the window or making snow angels, snow is the most beautiful thing in the world and to think that it occurs naturally and this white stuff is falling from the sky ON PURPOSE, just beautiful and it's just one of the moments when I look up into the sky and think, "I'm so happy to be alive!"
But I'm not ready for the snow this year and I wonder if that's because I'm not happy to be alive. Or rather, I'm just not happy right now. I know things are going to be different and that I'm supposed to be loving the winter, but I just have to realize that with Winter comes sadness and with sadness comes unhappiness and snowfall without boots.
"Do you dream in black and white?" he asked, half jokingly.
"Why? And no," I answered, confused.
"I found one of your papers in the grocery bag with part of a haiku written on it."
For the past week I've been carrying around one of our cloth grocery bags exclusively for the 7th Harry Potter book. I carry a pretty big purse, but the burden of carrying that book is the main reason why I haven't finished it yet. I still haven't finished it, but everyday I'm getting a little bit closer to the end. Perhaps I like things to be long drawn out over-complicated affairs. I probably do. It's more fancy like that. It's like showing up to work in a tuxedo and a top hat. I probably would, but it would be the ladies version -- some ball gown and a bouquet of flowers -- waving at people as I walked by on satin high heels. At the end of the day, I'd return home covered in dust and ink and wonder why so many people were staring at me having forgotten I was wearing the unusual. But it doesn't change the fact that one day I'm going to have to face the end of things.
This is what the piece of paper said:
dreams in black and white fighting villains in her sleep
...and then I didn't write an ending to it. But how about "but she never wins."
I used to be really good at stream of consciousness writing, but for some reason I haven't been writing at all lately. Sometimes I push myself, but most of the time, I don't do anything. I decided to take this opportunity to start writing again. So, not only am I posting to livejournal, but I'm actually using that nablopomo blog as something more than just another profile on some other site. So, here go read what I wrote there today instead of reading this boring entry informing you that I'm actually doing something interesting.
Dave started school on Wednesday.* I'm a bit jealous. Not really of school, but for some reason I don't want him to be away during the day and having to get up early. It's ridiculous that I'm thinking this way, because I was actually seeing too much of Dave during the summer and missing my time alone and now I don't want to be alone. That doesn't make any sense. I think I just want him to be available whenever I want like some sort of awesome boyfriend robot. He's already the awesome boyfriend bit, we'll have to work on the robot.
Work is work. There are days when I'm so incredibly complacent where I feel like I would never want to leave, but there are other days (most days) where I want to find some sort of job where I can snuggle with kittens all day and paint pictures of clouds. I guess I should get into teaching or something. I want to work in a library, maybe. But most likely, I just want to be a millionaire without the effort of working, so I can do whatever I want, whenever I want. I miss sitting at home and watching Food Network and PBS children's programming. I miss all of my favorite shows now. Although, I was quite sick of staying at home when I wasn't working. Go figure! I am never happy. Content, but not happy.
Obviously, most of these I will not do. There's just not enough time and Dave is still limping around and using crutches. Also, the nearest T station is doing shuttle buses for the weekend as they are working on a "modernization" or something project. *sigh* I hate taking the buses. They're crowded!
*& in case you were wondering, Dave is a sophomore at Northeastern. He started last year. We're both the same age (25, soon 26!), but he only got to take one semester of college in Maine. So, now he's starting over. He was an English major last year, but now he's International Business or something like that.
P.S. Do yourself a favor and push the "robot" link up there. ♥
-I bought the new Smashing Pumpkins and I pretty much hate it. Dave thinks it's because I don't want to like it and I'm not in my Smashing Pumpkins crazy-mega-fan phase. He might be right. I'm going to listen to it nonstop because I AM GOING TO SEE SMASHING PUMPKINS at the Orpheum. This will be my 5th Pumpkins show. Although, I saw Zwan and Billy Corgan solo too. :) Hopefully, I'll love all the songs by then.
-I think I'm addicted to iced coffee drinks. I really need to stop drinking them. Sometimes they make my stomach hurt and I'll stop drinking them for a few weeks, but I always end up craving them and I blame all the McDonald's ads I see on the subway.
& other things: -trying desperately to clean the apartment, failing -drinking lots of iced tea -avoiding people on the bus -joining Samantha's (whatsherdeal) button club -oohing & ahhing over Happy Owl Glassworks -talking about work in my sleep (according to Dave) -fitting in a smaller pair of jeans, woo! -updating my The Things I Want wishlist -enjoying free cone day (April 17) at Ben & Jerry's & then taking one lick of said cone and having to catch the ice cream as it fell off the cone and thankfully did not end up on the ground!
I've been looking at bento on flickr. I do believe I had one of these boxes when I was a child. I used to bring Japanese food to school all the time, mostly onigiri (rice balls) & maki (just rice with the little seaweed wrap around it)! I used to get made fun of a lot for that. Oh well.
Now that I bring lunch to work with me everyday, I'm thinking of bento and how much I'd love to make some of these creative lunches. I wish I had my bento box from when I was a girl. I also wish I had this neat pencil case my dad got me in Japan. I also have a GIANT Hello Kitty stuffed animal and I believe it's in the basement of our house in PA and I want that now too. It's probably moldy and been chewed by rodents by now. *sigh*
I should probably make a post about my house in PA, but that's for another night.
We didn't really do much on our anniversary other than eat Vietnamese food in Harvard Square and window shop. I haven't gone out to just go out in a long time. I always feel like we're on a mission, but yesterday, it was just us, doing nothing but hanging out.
Yesterday, I stumbled upon a site called one sentence -- true stories, told in one sentence. They are interesting, sad and funny. It's like the words only edition of post secret. It reminded me of an entry where I wrote about one sentence love stories that eventually turned into the book The Little Book of Water, Roads, Violence, Fireflies, Cigarettes, Heartbreak, Distance, Death, Devastation, and L'Amour Edited by Leigh Stein (wist).
Here is one that I wrote: Jane was constantly tripping over invisible cracks in the sidewalk, even though Boris held her arm tightly like a carriage driver, exclaming after each tumble, "Oh Jane, I still love you" as his back broke more with each step.
(There are some others in the linked entry.)
I didn't actually try to get into the book, but I really love the idea of flash fiction and the constriction of having a syllable count (haiku) or a word count (one sentence stories, 50 word stories, etc). I'm terrible with page counts. I've never written a story over 17 pages (the requirement was 30), but I have no problem writing short stories. I'm terrible with longer pieces.
Here are some more one sentence things I wrote yesterday after finding one sentence. They aren't necessarily true, but I was inspired. Some of these are more like the beginning of stories than a true one sentence story, so I'll have to play around some more.
1. Dee used to say that she'd never fall in love, that lust was more her game, until she met a writer that called her "my sea turtle" and she decided to never be lonely again.
2. That night there was a full moon, Anthony was holding my hand, and I couldn't stop laughing no matter how hard I tried.
3. Would we still have kissed if I had been sober?
4. Before we started going out, I thought you were annoying.
5. My first kiss happened at an International Club meeting with a boy that kept offering me a Pepsi can filled with booze.
6. Most people find their pets at a shelter, I found mine in the grocery store parking lot covered in tar and wagging his tail.
7. Her lips moved, but all I could focus on were the soft delicate lines that formed her face, I knew she was going to die.
8. When I was a little girl, I thought I was a boy.
9. Her lips moved, but she spoke in silence, the gasps of air weren't enough to save her.
Sleep was cut short this morning as I was having a bad dream. My mom was put into a prison, because they thought she was crazy for seeing/hearing ghosts. So, in order to save her, my sister and I were frantically searching the internets for proof that ghosts really did exist. We stumbled upon a website full of youtube-ish type videos of people talking and you'd hear these ghostly voices behind them and sometimes a wisp of white. I felt that this was the kind of proof that we needed to save my mom. We kept watching this one video over & over again and it seemed so real. Every time we watched it, I felt like we were magically transported to the creepy old house were the voices could be heard. This repetitious act is what woke me up. Our bedroom is so dark that I felt I could see things in the room around me. I tried to move closer to Dave, but I was afraid of waking him up. Plus, when I moved closer to him, he started to snore. There also seemed to be a pain in my stomach that felt like I had to pee. After getting out of bed, I realized it was actually cramps and took some ibuprofen to numb the pain, but it was 4:30am and I was wide awake. I tried to turn on the light and sleep in the living room, but it didn't matter what I did, I couldn't get back to sleep. I ended up amusing myself with some onlinegames till Dave woke up at 6am and I hugged him till he had to leave. I really want to go back to sleep, but instead I did exercises. I opened the windows in the bedroom to let in the light, but now, it's useless. I'm awake, awake, awake till I crash sometime this afternoon. I swear this all had something to do with the special on sleepwalking I watched before going to bed last night.
peaceful![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
sick
cold
numb
complacent
stressed
drained
thoughtful
giddy
cheerful
drooling
melancholy
nostalgic
awake
silly
