http://persephassa.com/inkybloaters/?p=578

between this house and any other house there is a wilderness, a vast sea of light. she’s learned to like what is around her. the sun high and deafening, the way to her house not long. she proceeds from the start and never thinks once of him.

sometimes she’d stand at the top of the stairway, looking down.

moving through each room, hoping that nothing is missing. the furniture hunched and shrouded with old bed sheets, more disordered than the address proved. she lifts a cloth from a mirror; nothing could exceed her outline. a woman’s beauty lies in a man’s desire for her. he’d lifted his glass and taken a drink; she’d watched it move down his throat and disappear. starring at herself, she finds she can’t agree. she stares in the mirror until she blushes at her own frank gaze. he only had the appearance of knowing what he was talking about. damp chasms and mouths!

the familiar assumes rightful shapes. she confides to the credenza, pulling open each drawer. of what value is beauty in a man? the dark is all within each room.

sounds come from within the house. the dull, persistent sounds of busy machines. she left a little metal clashing shut, an arched doorway beckoning.

in an earthquake she’d let the walls break without her.

thematryoshka

o How to cure a broken heart: cry for four hours, sleep for four hours, wake up and realize nothing has changed, but you are bone dry and can’t cry anymore so things must be looking up. Hide out in your room watching CNN on mute to remind you of how ridiculous this is with real problems in the world but counteract that intelligence by listening to Nat King Cole in the background.

Detailed Schedule:

7:40 a.m.—Show up at work, thinking you’ve got it together, in reality knowing your hanging by a thread.

7:42 a.m.-8:20 a.m.—Bawlfest 2008 in Bumblebee’s office.

8:21 a.m.-roughly 8:32 a.m.—Take day off, ride back to apartment with Mama, bawling most of the way.

8:32 a.m.-10:00 a.m.—Cry in Bed, leave mascara stains all over pillows.

10:01 a.m.-2:01 p.m.—Fall asleep

2:02 p.m.-2:05 p.m.—Think it is a good idea to eat icing out of the canister. Think your Siamese fighting fish, Boris, is the only creature, human or otherwise, out there that understands you. Figure you and Boris will be loners for life, with only each other, and decide that maybe you will become a man hater based on this experience.

2:06 p.m.-4:00 p.m.—Lay in bed and contemplate getting a shower.

4:00 p.m.-4:10 p.m.—Shower

4:10 p.m.-4:25 p.m.—Make-up, get dressed

4:26 p.m.-roughly 5:00 p.m.—take self-portraits, talk to brother, eat some more icing straight from container. Feel like you’ll puke from too much sugar, and then take a swig of root beer.

5:00 p.m.—until undetermined time—hang out with Nikki & Cole, talk shit about men, talk nice about other men, get root beer float at Sonic, walk aimless around: PetCo, Old Navy, and Hastings. Buy two t-shirts for 7 bucks a piece at Old Navy and a soda and fruit snacks fro Cole at Hastings.

Undetermined time-until undetermined time—watch Trey play video games, watch a little bit of the Daily Show, listen to Nat King Cole, watch the news, contemplate taking up smoking again for spite because the only reason I really quit was for him, decide I will smoke like a freight train until the day I die, hacking and drowning in my own black lungs, black to match my bitter dried up heart. Find myself sympathetic to Euripides’ Medea.

Undetermined time—fall asleep

o FlavorSplash by Aquafina tastes like watery grape koolaid. I’m thinking this is my new favorite beverage. Not that I like watery grape koolaide especially, but you know, I have this thing with not drinking water, so anything that helps.

o I don’t care if what Shonte says about L.L. botoxing his face, puhleasseeeee. Look at that body. That man is still “doin’ it and doin’ it and doin’ it well.” Shonte says, “His voice even sounds old. You are lusting after his body.” She also chastises me for not wearing my mermaid eyeshadow today. Ms. Mims is a ray of sunshine in my day.

o Lately my life feels like a Party of Five episode. This is not a good thing.

o Chipper entry coming tomorrow, I'm surviving. Don't worry.

curiositykitten

• 13:11 Watching soaps with my grandma.
• 14:44 Cindi Lauper on As the World Turns. So cute!

kawaii_not

What Bubble Tea design would you prefer on a t-shirt?

http://persephassa.com/inkybloaters/?p=577

the soft warmth of beauty in contrast with the cold of my own bed.

i turn from the window. earnestly repeating, i turn from the window. suns and systems turn from the window. a thousand worlds i turn from the window. at a glance i turn from the window and return to the pillow lying smooth as a stone. i return from the window and kneel at the side of my bed. the cold of my bed holding a thousand distant moons. i kneel at my bed and seek death. at my bed i kneel and repeat oh take me to a farther world. i kneel and look down upon my bed. i glance at my window and the insects working to offend me. i kneel at my bed and i repeat forgiveness, i swallow this poison. i swallow this poison, i glance at the window and regard the sparrow. i lay bare and endure it. i glance at the window and the sparrow gives me strength. i swallow this poison and pronounce the word forgiveness. i repeat forgiveness, how many times. i swallow the contents of the phial and turn to the window. i swallow this poison and rinse my mouth and hands. i turn from the window and carefully dry my mouth and hands. i repeat, oh purify me. i pronounce the word purify. i rinse my mouth and spit the water into a cup. i kneel beside the bed and pass a white handkerchief over my head. i pass a handkerchief of white lawn over my head and tie it under my chin. i kneel beside my bed and pass a handkerchief over my head and tie it near my temple. i lay bare. i lay gently down with a handkerchief over my head. i’ve swallowed this poison. i do not look toward the window.

i lay bare. i lay perfectly easy. i lay against the cold of my bed and hold my hand up to my face.

i lay perfectly at ease with a white handkerchief clinging to my face. i’ve swallowed this poison and i lay bare seeking death. i lay in my bed and cold reaches through to claim me. i lay perfectly at ease seeking death but no heaviness comes. i lay on my bed and wait.

i lay in my bed and daylight comes to the window. light floods through the handkerchief tied over my face and i feel warmth on my skin. when daylight floods through the window i feel myself still alive, and i lean over the edge of the bed. daylight comes with black ejection. i feel myself still alive and pronouncing poison. i lean over the edge of the bed and emerge from the past to the present. i’d swallowed this poison, and i conceal my soiled dress.

kore

day229, originally uploaded by persephassa.

wearing: vintage red slip, bought in some shop on melrose in like 2003; green melissa wedges; earrings from ebay

grainy photo, i dunno why.

http://www.theslackdaily.com/2008/07/things-you-should-know-about.html

http://tarynhipp.blogspot.com/2008/07/flickr-photo-of-day_03.html

Dinner Dance 4-9-1977, originally uploaded by woodmosaics.

Titled "Dinner Dance 4-9-1977"

Robin Tucker is the current Featured Seller on Etsy.com & after reading his interview & checking out his shop I decided to poke around his Flickr page to see all these animals he mentioned. I eventually came across this beautiful photo & knew I had to share it with you guys. Isn't it beautiful?